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303 Shares Does selling make you feel Pushy? Does the idea of having to sell make you want to run away? When most of us think about selling, we imagine a second-hand car salesman with a cigar and a sneaky grin.

Or we think of a persistent cold caller interrupting our dinner.shudder. In their book, Tim Hurson and Tim Dunne argue that many sales tactics are developed to sell to strangers. The purpose of these tactics “is to wrangle out a commitment to buy, even when buying may not be in the best interests of the client.” But selling doesn’t have to be this way.

You can sell without being pushy. Without dirty tactics. Without selling your soul. Oh, my goodness!

I could recognize all these sales techniques in other catalogs I buy from, and also in much of your work. Best of all, I think I have been doing this, which may partly explain when my rates of follow-through are higher, right? When I’ve told a story, often it’s about tiny glimpses into my life or my troubles. Folks seem more eager to connect to a real person, don’t they?

That is one thing I love about your site, that feeling of knowing a real person, being “in on” personal secrets, etc. One seed merchant I’ve bought from for years always photographs his huge dahlias in the hands of one of his daughters. Time passes and amazingly this child has grown to become one of the vice-presidents of the company. I certainly want to buy from her, since I almost feel as if she is my own daughter or niece. 🙂 It’s that insider feel, you know. Only a feeling, but so strong a tie! A lady in England is waiting for my next post about the baby chicks we just bought.

They will have more wing feathers in today’s photographs, and she is so anxious to see them again. Just as you say, the connection is there, has very little to do with either of our products, but is that human connection we all long for. Thanks for these great insights! Henneke, a fabulous post here covering a real recipe for selling success.

So true that selling to strangers is different than selling to those that know you. Those that know you may be “strange” to you but not you to them in a connected world. If you do the work. I have sold to strangers for many years. Some remained so, some became acquaintances but all those did so at their intent.

A great result of selling to strangers is the friends I have made, and most of those started as strangers to me. I’ll agree we shouldn’t need to sell to those that don’t know us as much anymore. The approach you chronicle is surely a base of strategies and tactics to work from which is as good as any today. Important because in sales you need a plan and an approach. Don’t be in sales, act as one. I’ll add to the thread by noting that goals and purposeful selling must be present in your mind.

Your purpose. Goals direct. Purpose clarifies your will. You’ll need will, online or face to face. You’ll need to know why you do what you do so you can remind yourself and communicate that with others. Selling to friends is a lot easier.

And you’ve included some great strategies for turning potential customers into friends first, then customers. It’s what Chris Garrett calls Attraction, Engagement, Sales. With the Engagement part taking as long or as short a time as it takes. Rather than the traditional dinnertime sales tactics of Attraction – Sales. Friends stay customers for longer. They buy more too. Your mini-story strategy the one I like.

Oh, and yes, a very lovable sketch. Reminds me of the illustrations in my Dr. Henneke, In the southern part of the U.S. To include Tx. The statement, ” He/She never met a stranger, ” is a complimentary colloquialism, probably a metaphor, that describes a person who is a highly relational individual & friendly, who can and will talk to anyone, anywhere. It has as much to do with the willingness to listen as it does with the willingness to talk. It is based on respect.

I’ve heard that statement all my life. I can imagine now how strange it sounded when it is heard literally. On another level though, while I meet people whom I don’t know, I assume some basic things about ever person I do meet. The two of us are aware of the experince of fear, hope, anger, love, desire, confusion, anticipation and the litney that makes us human reguardless of the place of origin, language, customs or traditons. Be still, don’t rush. Risk the opening line of a conversation and I find it a rare person that won’t follow through with a conversation.

Basically, I start in the middle of a relationship with any person I meet. I start with respect. It can develop or derail from there. But, I like you to start with. It really is hard for me to meet a stranger. Ah, now I understand what you mean.

I like that idea! And I agree – in most cases it’s good to start with respecting someone.

I can always change my mind and decide I don’t like them later on, can’t I? I’ve noticed that here in the North of the UK, sometimes when people haven’t seen you for a while (and when they think they should have seen you sooner), they’d say “Hi, stranger!”.

It’s like the opposite approach. Perhaps almost a little unfriendly, but as far as I’ve experienced it’s never meant in a bad way. Thank you for stopping by again, Curtis. Great post, Henneke. I am close to releasing my FREE eCourse and keep wondering whether I’m giving away too much information (Technique #2). Will people still want to buy my book?

I know deep down that the answer is ‘yes’. After all, look at you.

I read everything that you write and still look forward to purchasing your products. I’ve also had a little difficulty overcoming Technique #5 and posting a picture of myself on my home page (I’ll let you know when it’s live). What if my potential customers don’t like the way I look? Will I look too fat or too bald (I really don’t give a crap about that one)? That’s stupid thinking too. After all – I’ve been married for 41 years to a very attractive woman.

So I can’t be all that bad. You continue to give me confidence as I get ready for my first product launch. Thanks for all that you do. Henneke, Truly awesome post. And to think, it was inspired by a Christmas catalog.

The saying is true. You can certainly find inspiration anywhere. I love this post. If you’re writing copy or selling something, sharing your secrets or giving the impression that you’re sharing something secretive is a huge win. We all want to know secrets. So I agree, that’s truly a great tactic. But what I like the most, and I know I’ve mentioned this to you in previous posts, is the telling stories part.

That example you gave really made me want to read more and I’m not even a wine aficionado lol. But it goes to show you how simple stories can really pack a punch to anything we write. Awesome post. Henneke, This is awesome.

I knew I liked you! I love learning from the marketing successes and mistakes that others make. Who needs a fancy degree when opportunities for learning are all around us? (Unless you have one, in which case, hooray for you, that’s even better!) I absolutely agree that you have to meet those needs you listed if you want people to feel inspired to buy, share or whatever results we’re hoping them to achieve for us.

I like the idea of those special personal touches and of course, exclusive secrets as gifts. You’ve certainly given me a lot to think about! Hello Henneke!!Greetings from Brazil. I start my journey as salesperson few weeks ago and my biggest desire were to not be pushy and I read a lot of tips and techniques of sale but nothing were soul touching like this one, I really felt the love you feel for what you do and that’s something. Unfortunately I don’t know English that much to express better but I can say I’m so glad I found your post, your site and “you”. Is like stepping into a nice, warm and cozy coffee shop and receive a beautiful smile from the stranger person sitting in front.

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Though I learned through the comments here that “there no are strangers”. Happy New Year!